Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
