GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
