I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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