you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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