If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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