That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
