Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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