is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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