Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
