We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Randomize
