I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
did you just send me my own nude
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
