Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
