Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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