Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
