i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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