im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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