playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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