it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
