i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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