Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize