She's JV to your varsity
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Naked Twister starts at high noon
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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