Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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