I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
