i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You need a sexual gate keeper
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
