I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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