You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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