She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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