I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
