we're making bets on your personal life
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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