Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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