How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
