It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
