i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize