He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
