He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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