I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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