their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
