A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
