I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
