Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I intend to get homeless drunk
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
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