i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
