you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
