i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize