I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
