how do flat chested girls get laid?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
