we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
