just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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