Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
