Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
