would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
