You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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